This one began with talking with the next academic person over about mobile phones.
That is, he mentioned he might want a new one to replace his dinosaur, sighed over the prices of the i-Apples thingies, and talk ensued. Friday talk.
I gave advice —
Me: “Well I can recommend Android. Not that I’ve used any of the alternatives but, hey, Android is good!”
— and more advice —
Me: “Oh, and there are two types of touchscreens. I don’t remember what they’re called or what is better, but get the better one. It only reacts to, like, human touch, human skin, you know.”
He: “So no dice for zombies?”
Me: “No. Zombies are out of luck. Zombies are stuck with inferior phones. That’s why they’re irate. Zombies are out on the streets demanding better phones, groaning JOOOOBS!”
— and explained the joys of mobile Internet —
Me: “Like, if I go to the loo and remain there a long time, that’s the reason. I’m diddling with the phone.”
Me: “Or if I, like, scream ‘Oh no!’ or ‘Bloody shit!’ or ‘Stop it, you bloody lunatics! Stop this madness!’ — it’s, like, just me on the Internet in the loo, reading news, and not something, like, weird. So don’t feel obligated to knock.”
— and by the end he wasn’t so worried about getting a new phone.
I’m great in easing the worries of others.