If I was evil

To begin with: One of the apps on my Android — note the capitalization; if it was a lower-case thing I would out of personal aesthetic preference have a gynoid — is a virus scanner thingie. It has several additional features, one of which is a “stolen phone” mode that you can activate through a website if your phone is stolen. (Well duh.) It apparently makes the phone go all fire siren with howlin’ sounds and flashin’ of varicolored lights.

Now, if I was an evil genius, I would use one of my many fears for fuel, hack that very site, and make the (probably) hundreds of thousands of phones with the “stolen phone” mode on go off like so many audiovisual grenades.

You might protest this idea is not particularly genius-like, and not all that evil either. Fine, then: “Now, if I was a technically adept amoral joker… then the same.”

For more fine ideas in mischief, I mine three tweets of mine:

  • If I could and would write a computer virus, it’d be one that added the string “rule 34” to every Google search.
  • Another fine virus idea: One that ends all your tweets with #toilettweeting.
  • A virus idea: one that makes one word of every ReCaptcha a different word for hate and loathing. Because eventually you’d start to wonder.

Basically, I’m shite with evil.

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